Inglorious Basterds

QT's Inglorious Basterd's is in my opinion his best film. This by no means is an objective analysis. When I was a child my dad had a knack for old school ww2 films. Every weekend that we didn't go to the cinema, we would throw on The Longest Day, Kelly's Heroes, Dirty Dozen, Tora Tora, ect (you get the point). My dad in his infinite wisdom would say "the Nazi's were a worthy adversary." This film reminded me of the old times watching people kick Nazi ass with my dad. So nostalgia plays a huge part in my love for IB.

First off, most the old ww2 films that QT is post modernizing were clocking in at over 2.5 hrs. Dirty Dozen is long and only has one small action sequence at the end, but the movie is phenomenal. IG is also long and most people I talk to think he should have cut a half hour out. For audiences today he might have considered it.

The Good: There is two stories with good guys, but my favorite "good" guy is Eli Roth, who wields a baseball bat when it comes to Nazi torturing. I never really like Roth, but him playing a pissed off Jew with one goal: KILL NAZI, really brought out the mandom in him.

The Bad: The single best performance in this film is by Christoph Waltz, who plays a Jew hunting Nazi. The first sequence of the film sets him up as one smart, sick, and villainous Nazi. "Where does the hawk look? He looks in the barn, he looks in the attic, he looks in the cellar, he looks everywhere *he* would hide, but there's so many places it would never occur to a hawk to hide. However, the reason the Führer's brought me off my Alps in Austria and placed me in French cow country today is because it does occur to me. Because I'm aware what tremendous feats human beings are capable of once they abandon dignity." Col. Hans Landa.

The Badass: Brad Pitt is one BAMF. "I think you show great talent. And I pride myself on having an eye for that kind of talent. Your status as a Nazi killer is... still amateur. We all come here to see if you wanna go pro... "

The Beautiful: Our heroine played by Melanie Laurent is a pissed French woman, who wants to kill Nazi's (who would have thought). It's hard to talk about her character without spoilers so I'm just gonna say she looked stunning in the end sequence.

Over all this film proves to be a funny trip down Nazi killin lane, that we all need to take again, so please go check it out.

Dirty Dozen

I saw it on bluray at target for like 10 bucks so I had to grab it. It's a pretty damn good movie. It's been a while since I've seen an old World War movie so I had to get back in the mode of long movies with lots of pissed off officers always yelling at each other, but after that I was game. So check it out if you don't have a Transformers 1 or 2 movie attention span (IE a brain). Thank god for old action movies, when explosions were real and so were the men.

The Good: Lee Marvin is a our good guy. He has to whip some prisoners (the badddddest bad asses) into doing a top secret mission. There is only one man who can do this and that is Marvin, he kicks their ass, throws em around, and laughs in their face all the time.

All the training stuff is filled with old school comedy that actually has some class (not like robots humping Megan Fox's leg). They do funny shit like capture an officer that is messing with them just to show how much they rock.

There is one great scene where there are 8 "girls" hired or something to go spend the night with the dozen and there is a good 3 minute awkward silence where they are just staring at each other. All the girls get chosen then Charles Bronson (resident god of action) in his infinite class dances with the ugliest and oldest one with a huge grin on his face. Thats MANDOM.

The Bad: ZEEEEE GERMANS. Yup they are made fun of, look dumb, and killed like pigs when the mission starts. I guess that's what happens when your Nazi scum. Being that the movie was made in mid sixties they didn't explore the PC bs of "the Germans were just following orders." They just whoop their ass hardcore prison rules style.

The Ugly: There is a fat ass prisoner named Maggot who kills women and would be the ugliest and sickest POS in the movie. Good thing he gets his.

The Badass: Jefferson is this huge black dude (played by football star Jim Brown) who does a mad dash while throwing grenades down holes into a shelter where the pesky Nazis are hiding. The guy can fuckin move and completes the mission with zeal. = BADASS. Or what we call in movies the HNIC (head nigga in charge).

The Food: Eat some Sausage and laugh about how much fun 12 prisoners have blowin up Nazis.